undyingcrow | route666rp IC Inbox

[Soft feathers coat his neck, no longer fluffed up in agitation. He leans into the touch, posture drooping somewhat.]

You say that as though you've done anything that requires forgiveness to begin with.

[Affirmations, love... One day, perhaps he'll believe he's worthy of such affections. As it stands, it's still so daunting...

Though, perhaps less so than before.]

Edited 2025-08-12 03:56 (UTC)

Haven’t I? I made you angry. And I … I feel like I hurt you, and that’s the last thing I ever wanted to do.

[Ren’s not good at letting a problem sit unresolved. They’re both now calmer at least, no longer arguing, but the balance between them is still wrong. It’s Ren’s fault, so he needs to make it right. The question now is how, and that answer isn’t presenting itself.]

What can I do to make amends?

[I don’t want to lose you, he thinks, with a worried frown, and the depth of that truth makes his heart beat unsteadily and his throat tight with fear.]

You don't have to do anything extreme. I was angry, yes, but only because you were trapped in an abhorrent state of mind I could do little to resolve.

[He isn't like Ren. He can't pull miracles out of a hat. Comforting isn't in his blood...

It hurt, obviously, but it's hardly the worst pain he endured in his life.]

Right now, you should... relax, I suppose. Give yourself space to breathe. I will be here.

[Akechi may not believe he has any skill at comforting, but what he has to offer by virtue of who he is is already more than enough for Ren. They’re rivals, alike in so many ways and intimately tangled up in each other; they both possess a deep, unique understanding of each other that can’t be equaled by anyone else. Not only is Akechi the only one here from their world, he is also the only one who challenges Ren, the only one who shoves past all of his masks to the truth at his center. Ren loves his Thieves and he knows they love him too, but none of them call him on his bullshit like Akechi does, and he needs that push to better himself, or he’ll only stagnate in those same comfortable habits of neglecting his own needs and ignoring his feelings and loving everyone but himself.

By nature of that intense familiarity they share, Akechi is really the only person Ren can show this level of vulnerability. It’s not that he’s intentionally and actively dishonest or manipulative with his friends - he is simply what they need him to be. He is a mirror for their expectations, and as he pointed out earlier, no one needs him to be normal. No one needs Ren to be the one they give their advice or ask what problems they can solve for him. They don’t ask, and neither does he.

But Akechi - his rival, his foil, his other half who knows him so well - wants Ren to practice what he preaches. And that’s fair. He wants Ren to care for himself the way he cares for others, and there’s a level of his own brand of caring in pushing Ren to do so.]

Would you stay with me?

[Ren cringes at how needy that sounds, how pathetic and weak his own words sound echoing in his ears. But … he’s trying. Voicing what he wants and needs is what Akechi wants him to do more of, right? The only thing Ren wants in this moment is to hold Akechi close, reassure both of them that the world they’ve begun to build together won’t end over these mistakes he’s made.]

I don’t think I could relax right now if I’m alone.

I will.

[His lungs slowly inflate with a quiet breath, and he inches closer.]

Do you want to take this inside?

[It might be more comfortable, perhaps, particularly in light of all the supplies they'd gathered in the city.]

Thank you, [Ren murmurs, and manages a weak smile. A heavy, invisible weight lifts from his chest, and it’s not so difficult to breathe anymore.

He does want to rest inside the van - crawl into the comfort of its dark, cushioned interior and curl up like a cat next to his more-than-rival. Maybe they can forget the world outside for a while. Ren nods and drops his hand from the side of Akechi’s neck.]

Is it OK if I … ?

[He gently reaches for Akechi’s hand, hoping he’ll be allowed to twine their fingers together for the short distance to the door of the van.]

You may.

[Here, he'll even offer his left hand. Ren needs it right now; there's little sense in responding with sass.]

[Ren takes Akechi’s hand in both of his and holds it up so he can press a grateful kiss over his knuckles. With a hesitant smile, he nods and starts slowly backing up to lead them both toward the door of the van. Ren doesn’t take his eyes off Akechi until they reach the door, as if he’s afraid his more-than-rival will vanish the second he’s no longer in sight.

The back of the van is decidedly more comfortable after several scavenging trips in the last city, but it’s still more of a disorganized nest of cushions and blankets than a truly livable space. Ren hasn’t had much focus for organizing since his brain has been so occupied with screaming about his failures. Reluctantly, he releases Akechi’s hand to climb inside the van and attempt at getting settled.]

Edited 2025-08-19 03:08 (UTC)

[Once they reach the van, Akechi follows Ren inside. He would kick off his shoes, if his pawed feet didn't make wearing shoes a logistical nightmare.

Instead, he'll settle for wiping them as best he can, then settling in the aforementioned pile of cushions and blankets.

A thought occurs to him. It's... stupid. Incredibly so, and yet...]

I suppose you'd enjoy feeling my feathers.

[Would Ren enjoy that? He remembers they talked about it a while back, and it seemed appealing. Just being allowed that level of closeness is a lot for Akechi to permit, much less suggest unprompted. Ren sits up from his pile of pillows with cautious interest.]

Would that be OK?

I wouldn't offer otherwise.

[Just give him a minute to shed his layers, or...

Hm. This is going to be more tedious with his wings. So, with a small sigh, he shifts into his nekomata form, horns and wings and talons giving way to more feline features.]

...It's more manageable this way.

[Once he sheds his blazer and shirt, he folds them and sets them aside for tomorrow's wash, but...

With another breath, it's back to his chimera form.]

[Ren watches Akechi’s transformations quietly, with rapt attention. The other boy holds so much power and seems to handle the shifts with such ease, and Ren can’t help thinking once again that it was so unfair Akechi didn’t receive the same guidance from the Velvet Room that he received. Even if it was an impostor pulling the strings of that puppet show, Ren can’t deny he still benefited from all he was given.]

You never stop amazing me.

Are you sure that's not your bias towards cats talking?

[He flashes a smirk, staying in chimera form for now. Look at those floofy chest feathers and his sigil...]

[A ghost of a smile curves Ren’s lips, and he shakes his head.]

It’s my bias towards you.

[No one can ever accuse Ren of being impartial when it comes to Akechi. He sighs softly as he takes in the sight of his more-than-rival, feathers and sigil exposed and inviting.]

Do you want to see mine?

[He has no feathers, but he does have a sigil, even though he still doesn’t know what it means.]

I don't see the harm in it.

[He has been curious, admittedly. Not so curious as to pry, but curious all the same.

For now, he'll remain still, letting Ren move at his own pace.]

[The harm, of course, is in the knowing.

Ren has been in this world for months without yet learning what he will become; he is no detective, and he hadn’t seen the need to seek out the significance of his sigil. Until recently, Ren believed it simply didn’t matter, that whatever shape into which the forces at work in this place saw fit to twist his body wouldn’t change the essence of who he is. Now, in light of recent events, Ren isn’t so certain. Although the effect that caused his ill-conceived outburst of self-loathing appears to have subsided, there’s no way of knowing if it will return again.

How will he live with himself if the monster he’s forced to become doesn’t care about hurting the people he loves? Or worse - what if he becomes something that enjoys inflicting pain?

But the offer to reveal his marking has been made, and if anyone deserves to know what’s in store for Ren, it’s Akechi. Trepidation wraps pythonesque around his chest. Ren can’t imagine Akechi won’t immediately recognize the shape of his sigil. He nods silently, then shrugs out of the short-sleeve button-up shirt layer and sets it aside. The glasses are gently pulled off his face next, folded and carefully set in a safe corner. Finally, Ren pulls the plain T-shirt over his head, further ruffling his already-unruly hair, and moves in closer to Akechi.

It’s silly, Ren thinks, to be nervous about this. They’ve seen each other unclothed before. But it was different at the bathhouse - there’d been moments of intimacy then, but they’d seemed stumbled upon, accidental. This time, the closeness between them is intentional, and he swallows hard against the beat of his heart resting high in his throat before tapping a finger at the mark on his chest, placed over his heart - a figure resembling a halo with wings.]

So, [he asks, with a thin smile,] what’s my diagnosis?

[At such a short distance, even in the dim light, Akechi may be able to spot other faint marks scattered across Ren’s skin, scars earned from innumerable Metaverse battles. Wounds obtained in the cognitive realm are never as severe in the real world, but some do still persist, even after a spell or trinket has been used to heal them.

The most notable of Ren’s scars were acquired in a different sort of battle, though. A thin, darker line circles around each of his wrists where months ago, a pair of handcuffs once scraped his skin raw.]

[The sigil grabs Akechi's attention, of course. Wings, a halo. It's all rather straightforward, especially after seeing Serph.]

An angel... Quite the choice.

[But that's hardly the important part. No, those scars, especially around the wrists, draw Akechi's razor sharp gaze.

A subtle wince overtakes him for the blink of an eye, ears folding back.]

...I let this happen.

[Another sign of his betrayal staring him in the face.]

[An angel. Quite the choice indeed. Ren thinks of some of his former Personas - Michael, Gabriel, Metatron - and almost laughs. Almost, but something shifts Akechi’s mood, and it breaks Ren out of the moment.

It nearly takes Ren too long to realize what upset Akechi. The scars on his wrists are something he rarely spares a thought for, and they’ve long since stopped hurting. Ren leans in, gently shaking his head.]

I let it happen too. Remember? I knew what you planned to do.

[And that wasn’t his first time being caught on the opposite side of the law. He more or less knew what to expect from the interrogation room. Carefully, he reaches for Akechi’s hand, hoping he’ll be allowed to take it in his own.]

I don’t regret it. And I’d do it again, if it meant keeping my friends safe. I’d do it all again in a heartbeat to keep you safe, too.

You truly astound me.

[Still, there's little sense in fighting it. If this is how Ren feels, then so be it...

He'll accept Ren's hand, mindful of his own talons. At least Ren knows to expect them.]

I must look ridiculous, shirtless while wearing gloves...

[This is the most exposed he's been in some time, barring solitary showers. Not that they haven't been fully exposed before. The bathhouse immediately comes to mind, but things were so different then.]

Is that your bias talking now?

[Ren flashes him a cheeky grin, then dips his head to press a light kiss against the back of his wrist, below the hem of the glove.]

I love you. And you look perfect just the way you are.

[But if the gloves make Akechi feel self-conscious, there’s an easy and obvious fix for that.]

I can take them off, if you want.

[Does he want it? Akechi accepts the kiss on his wrist, eyes fixed on Ren for every moment those lips connect.

It's... hm. Well, it's not as though they haven't shown affection in other ways.]

Feel free. I can only imagine how curious you are.

I’m always curious about you. Always have been.

[Ren can’t help being fascinated; Akechi is so complex, a riddle wrapped in secrets and masks, a crossword puzzle with more puzzles for clues. He could devote the rest of his life to studying the other boy and never stop discovering new truths.

Ren smiles fondly, then turns his attention and his nimble fingers to carefully peeling off Akechi’s glove, mindful of the talons. Once the glove is free, Ren smooths out the fabric and sets it aside, near his glasses. Taking Akechi’s now-bare hand in his own, Ren lightly brushes his fingertips over the bumpy texture.

It’s so different from human skin, and maybe some people would find it hideous or repulsive, but not Ren. No matter what Akechi looks like, he’s beautiful in Ren’s eyes. He fights the impulse to again say I love you and instead silently shows the sentiment with a slow, careful press of his lips to the back of Akechi’s hand.]

Well, consider this a learning opportunity.

[The bumpy, scaly texture continues to right below the elbows, at which point feathers take hold. His posture relaxes at the kiss, and he lets Ren savor this moment.

But, being Goro Akechi, he can't just keep it at that.]

Did you know that birds don't actually have backwards knees? It's a common misconception, due to the proportions of their legs and their feathers obscuring the actual knee and calves.

[Ren will be the most attentive, diligent student when it comes to an opportunity for learning more about Goro Akechi. Top of his class, no doubt. He stares up at the other boy through those long, dark lashes and shakes his head with a faint smile curving his mouth.]

I had no idea.

[Just as carefully as before, Ren’s fingers work the glove off Akechi’s other hand.]

Did you know, [he counters, smoothing out the second glove and storing it on top of its mate,] that I love when you tell me nerdy little facts like that?

[Just like with Akechi’s other hand, Ren dips his head to place a soft kiss on the scaly skin. He sighs a quiet note of contentment and brushes his thumb over the bumps of the other boy’s knuckles.]

Mm. I had my suspicions.

[Chuckling, he basks in the second kiss. All this attention, just for him. It's just so funny in hindsight.]

But to put it simply, a majority of birds are digitigrade. That is to say, they stand on their digits. Even the duck, with its webbed feet, tiptoes its way through life, and what many mistake as the entire foot is little more than the toes.

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